Funny Quotes about Hollywood

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Ever since they found out that Lassie was a boy, the public has believed the worst about Hollywood.
        —Groucho Marx

Failure is inevitable. Success is elusive.
        —Steven Spielberg (American Film Producer, Director and Screenwriter)

God gave us a penis and a brain, but not enough blood to use both at the same time.
        —Robin Williams (American Actor and Comedian)

Half the people in Hollywood are dying to be discovered and the other half are afraid they will be.
        —Lionel Barrymore

He reminded me a little of Walt Disney's version of a mad scientist.
        —Steven Spielberg (on Star Wars Director George Lucas)

Hollywood is a place where a man can get stabbed in the back while climbing a ladder.
        —William Faulkner

Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.
        —Walter Winchell

Hollywood's a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss, and fifty cents for your soul. I know, because I turned down the first offer often enough and held out for the fifty cents.
        —Marilyn Monroe

Hosting the Oscars is like making love to a beautiful woman - it's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal's out of town.
        —Steve Martin (at the 2001 Oscars)

Funny Quotes about Hollywood: